Hey Ya'all Foolish People, Come On In! Let's Talk About Sex!

Alright.. I've been bored, stressed out at work. I need a good laugh. So today, our topic is one thing all men (and women, don't cha deny it!) lust for, day and night - Sex.

Yeah, I can see it, you're hooked. Now, you didn't think I'm really going to talk about sex, do you?

Well.. as a matter of fact, sort of, but not the "Sex" you're thinking.

It's about a man who named his dog "Sex".

Ya ready? Alrighty.. read on. *Story begins*

Everyone I know who has a dog usually call them "Rover" or "Boy". I call mine "Sex".

Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me.

When I went to the city hall to renew his dog licence, I told the clerk that I would like a license for Sex. He said, "I'd like to have one too." Then I said, "You don't understand. I've had Sex since I was nine years old." He said, "You must've been quite a kid!"

When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the hotel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me, and a special room for Sex. He said, "Every room in the place is for Sex." I said, "You don't understand. Sex keeps me awake at night." The clerk said, "Me too."

One day I entered Sex in a contest, but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just looking around. I told him I have planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me that I should've sold tickets. "But you don't understand," I said, "I had hopes to have Sex on TV." He called me a show-off.

When my wife and I seperated, we went to court fighting for custody of the dog. I said, "Your honor, I had Sex before I was married. The judge said, "Me too." Then I told him that after I was married, Sex left me. He said, "Me too."

Last night Sex ran off again, I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over to me and asked, "What are you doing in the alley at 4.00 o'clock in the morning?" I said, "I'm looking for Sex."

*Story ends*

Stress is nothing but accumulated tensions. Find nitty-gritties, funny lil' stuff to keep you entertained during high-stress period will certainly help keep your emotions in place. I hope you enjoyed my Sex talk, please if you have one, share one with me too.

Peace out, dudes.

Top 3 World's Dumbest Person..

This is a tribute to all my loyal readers and my friends. Please, be my guest, enjoy the clips. - Joe

World's Dumbest Criminal

Get prepared to roll over your stomach while this dude tried sneaking into a store for "free" stuff.

First question wrong on Who Wants to be a Millionaire

"What the hell..?!" You would ask. This guy can't even answer the easiest question for a quick $100 cash! I bet a 3-year old could do better!

Miss Teen USE 2007 - South Carolina Answering A Question

Try answering to this:
"Recent polls have shown 1/5 of America can't locate the US on the World map. Why do you think this is?"

And then watch as South Carolina attempt the question...

Honestly? Transformer Sucks!

If you're looking to watch Transformer, sorry but I'm going to disappoint you by saying this - Transformer sucks, BIG TIME!

Why? It's not the story line, or the characters, but the fact that it just wasted 30++ bucks out of my wallet.. Well, today is the second time I watch Transformer, and guess what? I'm going to watch it again, tomorrow!

Argh! Basically what I wanted was to join my friends, having great time, out there. But everytime someone proposes for movie, it's definitely "Transformer, Transformer.. Transformer!" (Duh~~) So no choice, it's kinda weird if I join them just for the lunch and then go home after that..

BUT, the fortunate thing is, I get to see Megan Fox everytime I watch Transformer, and that's what kept me going (watching 3 times of the Robots fighting wasn't fun, but I don't really mind watching Megan Fox in action, again and again, Hah!)

She's HOT! (You must be Gay to say she's not)

So, after the movie today, I'm supposed to meet up with some primary friends of mine, I did, and guess what? 5 girls attended, and I'm the ONLY guy (lucky dude me, Andrew - you flaked!), had a great time all in all, at least I get to patch up things I've missed..

.. My friends. Old-time friends.

If you're one of them that I've not met, don't hesitate to hit me up, phone, facebook, MSN, whatever.. Just get in touch with me! (I won't hesitate to watch Transformer with you guys, again!)

I Was Conned $400 Bucks Today, WTF?!

Alright, maybe not conned. But rather, sold.

I finally made up my mind to go for Gym, and I chose Celebrity Fitness for this, I'll be frequenting the branch in 1 Utama.

Now, today what I wanted was to go down, check out the prices and maybe join next week. But guess what? I was sold - the way I used to sell people stuff online.

There was the "sales page" - 1 Indian fella came over took us through the tour and explained everything we needed to know. When I showed I couldn't quite afford the price up front ($800), there goes the "exit page pop up", those pop ups that you see whenever you leave a page saying they'll give you a discount - the price went down to $400 (I knew it, damn..), but I was still contemplating, the guy was so desperate to get my card out of my wallet, he gave me the "scarcity" - he said this offer only last for the FIRST visit. (So I took my Card out, why? he gave me an offer I couldn't resist, especially when I already wanted to join). Then he went processing my details, and here comes the "upsell" - one dude he came over saying hello, explaining the "personal trainer" stuff to us, which costs about $4000+, crazy... And then, when we express that it's too much for us, here comes the "downsell"... He said maybe we could get some basic trainer first for $1,800.. And lastly, after giving me the receipts and stuff, the indian dude perform the "viral" method, he gave me a list to fill my contacts with so he could call them up (great, spot on, I was doing all these things in the Internet..)

All in all, I paid the $400 and that's it. We were sold. I find it funny because I actually LEARN such marketing techniques in Internet Marketing - we do this in Websites. And this is the first time I encounter this in real life.. This is THE system, no matter you're doing your business online, or offline, this is THE system you should think about. It definitely increases conversions, you sales, by a ton..

Just As I Thought I Had Everything I Wanted..

I was too obsessed, I indulged myself too much into my own thing, my own thoughts, and I thought I am happy, but I could've been happier, made all of you happier.

I would say, I would live a leisure life with my Internet Marketing career, I would make friends all around the World when I start hitting the "travelling" route, next few years in my life, I would give my family the best life ever, I would make seminars making other people's life as happy as mine.

All those all those - "I would"s. I totally missed the whole part.

I work my ass off trying to get the wheels rolling for my career, although I work at home, I was working more than 10 hours a day, dedicated, yeah, but after seeing things closely, and finally got rid of my hurdles (my mum shows supportive). I realize - WHAT THE HECK JOE? What is the rush for? It's not like, I'm gonna have a heart attack in next 2 months now.

I missed out many things, precious things, of my life, up til now, some are lost, damages are done, some remained. But there are those that are still neutral out there - My friends, my long lost friends that I've never been able to meet up with after all these years that I was in Singapore.

Seriously? I MISS YOU GUYS

As shameful as I could be, I only miss you guys when I'm back, when I need you all. But still, I'm shouting out to those that are reading this, I know all of you are busy, working, but here I am now, Malaysia, for long. I'm not really sure when will you guys be free, but you know you could always hit me up with a phone call whenever you want, and we're all set to go get a drink. Ya?

I want my life back, my friends, too. Nothing is too late. Just hit the damn call button. (This, I'm talking to myself, be prepared to hear from me you guys..)

Joe

Everything Had Been In Place For Me, But..

Alright guys, it's been a long part since I've updated my blog here.

I hope all of you have been fine. I've finally spilled the beans about my career to my mum after much contemplating - I braced myself, expected some fiery scoldings, showed her my earnings as an "Internet Marketer", she didn't quite understand it but she wasn't angry, at all.

Your future, your choice. She even offered to help me open a bank account.

All these while, I've always linked her with the old scary mum, which would burst out as she didn't like something. But I noticed, I hadn't been paying attention to her, and not only her.. Once I start realizing, she's been supporting all my activities, I got into a small accident which cost her $1000, she didn't say a thing, just a few mumble grumble. I wanted to use the car, she would ask "why" and nothing else, she didn't stop me. I told her, I'm not working, she helped offer me advice and how to settle the bonds that I'm escaping..

If only, I could be more attentive, to my loved ones around me. It all seem SO simple, if only I "talk". I was always thinking too much to myself, assuming this assuming that, I think way too far and in the end? I got everything all wrong.

This is me, my problem, and I've ignored this problem for so long until I finally come back, and SPEND time with my loved ones. Lucky for me, my mum's been tolerated me for don't know how many years and she's still there to support me, forgive me. But there are certain things where damages had been done, and there''s just nothing I could do to heal them...

I learned this the hard way, but it's still not too late. I will get better, and even better. I won't give up, improving myself.

I've Sinned.. With No Turning Back

Alright, first off I must thank you for coming back to my blog again, I've not been updating it as frequent as expected.

Many things had happened since I last posted. My professor kept pointing me the "wrong" direction, almost had my final year project (FYP) failed, luckily I'm still able to patch things back right before my exams, which eventually led to a lack of time to study for my exam, seriously I don't really know how did I survive last 2 weeks, I slept 4 hours each day, working on FYP, assignments, and exam.

But now, it's all over... I still had to continue my FYP due to incomplete of results, but that's another thing, I'm a free bird now!

To be honest, I have never gave myself in when I'm studying, not a time in these 4 years in NTU. I never got an A, except for lab sessions. I've defeated the purpose of mum sending me to university, it's like dumping her $10,000/$20,000 per year into the sea.

I'm glad she trusted me, for not asking for my result transcript all these years, answers I gave were extremely simple, "OKOK lah~", "Won't fail lah~", "Quite fine lah~".. My mum knew nothing about my routines in NTU, my life in NTU, what I've done, what people I've met, and yet she trusted me on these words, or say, she had no choice but to trust because that was all I told her. I've tried telling her that "my grades are not-so-good lah~" everytime she asked, but I got the feeling that she still thinks that I'm doing "OK" in my studies, which is totally not. Ha...

I've sinned mum, forgive me, for I will make it up for you, I will excel in my careers than many others that had paid more attentions in studies than me. For this, I have a truck load of faith.

Before anything, I want to extent my utmost gratitude for someonethat's been standing by my side for the worst time that I've been through -- My dear Gillian. Although she's not been physically "standing" by my side (we're 5 hours apart...) but I felt her words everytime through phone, it's been 2 months plus since I last met her. And guess what? I'm coming back soon! Probably this Sunday, which is tomorrow.

Many had asked me about what I'm going to do next, after the graduation, I've gave tons of different answers, because I don't know how to answer these people, even though there's only 1 answer in my heart -- I'm not working, anymore.

Keep coming back, or you can get alerted by emails using the "Get Updated" icon top-right. And I'll expose to you my plans.. my thoughts, and my future careers....

Until then, see ya!

Joe